When there’s no more hearts and flowers… Divorce?

My husband is an Accountant, I love him
for his steady nature, and I love the warm feeling when I lean
against his broad shoulders.

Three years of courtship and now, three years into
marriage, I would have to admit, that I am getting tired of it. The
reasons of me loving him before, has now transformed into the cause of all
my restlessness.

I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive
when it comes to a relationship and my feelings, I yearn for the
romantic moments, like a little girl yearning for candy. My husband, is my
complete opposite, his lack of sensitivity, and the inability of bringing
romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about love. One
day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce.

“Why?” he asked, shocked. “I am tired, there are no
reasons for everything in the world!” I answered.

He kept silent the whole night, seems to be in deep
thought with a lighted cigarette at all times.

My feeling of disappointment only increased, here
was a man who can’t even express his predicament, what else can I hope
from him?

And finally he asked me:” What can I do to change
your mind?” Somebody said it right, it’s hard to change a person’s
personality, and I guess, I have started losing faith in him.

Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered :
“Here is the question, if you can answer and convince my heart, I will
change my mind, Let’s say, I want a flower located on the face of a
mountain cliff, and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause
your death, will you do it for me?”

He said :” I will give you your answer
tomorrow….” My hopes just sank by listening to his response.

I woke up the next morning to find him gone, and
saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting, underneath a milk
glass, on the dining table near the front door, that goes….

My dear,

“I would not pick that flower for you, but please
allow me to explain the reasons further..”

This first line was already breaking my heart. I
continued reading.

“When you use the computer you always mess up the
Software programs, and you cry in front of the screen, I have to save
my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs.

You always leave the house keys behind, thus I have
to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you.

You love traveling but always lose your way in a
new city , I have to save my eyes to show you the way.

You always have the cramps whenever your “good
friend” approaches every month, I have to save my palms so that I can calm
the cramps in your tummy.

You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will
be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell
you jokes and stories to cure your boredom.

You always stare at the computer, and that will do
nothing good for your eyes, I have to save my eyes so that when we
grow old, I can help to clip your nails, and help to remove those
annoying white hairs. So I can also hold your hand while strolling down the
beach, as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand… and tell you the
colour of flowers, just like the color of the g low on your young face…

Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is
someone who loves you more than I do… I could not pick that flower yet,
and die.. ”

My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of
his handwriting… and as I continue on reading…

“Now, that you have finished reading my answer, if
you are satisfied, please open the front door for I am standing outside
bringing your favorite bread and fresh milk…

I rush to pull open the door, and saw his anxious
face, clutching tightly with his hands, the milk bottle and loaf of
bread….

Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as
much as he does, and I have decided to leave the flower alone…

That’s life, and love. When one is surrounded by
love, the feeling of excitement fades away, and one tends to ignore the
true love that lies in between the peace and dullness.

Love shows up in all forms, even very small and
cheeky forms, it has never been a model, it could be the most dull and
boring form.. . flowers, and romantic moments are only used and
appear on the surface of the relationship. Under all this, the pillar of true
love stands… and that’s our life… Love, not words win arguments…

——————-
This letter was sent to me by a friend and it made me cry gallons of tears maybe because I can somehow relate. I’m the ‘hearts and flowers’ type of girl probably because of too much romantic movies and reading erotic romance books like Fifty Shades that I became so idealistic about love. I easily get disappointed when things don’t turn out the way I want them to and most of the time leads to arguments with my husband. But reading this letter, I realized it’s not always about romance and cheesy stuff. I know my husband loves me so much even if he’s not into romantic moves and sweet gestures all the time. It just feels good if he does make me feel like a princess in a fairytale. And admit it or not all women love to feel that way sometimes. But like the man in this letter, my husband knows what he wants and I know he loves me the best way he can, even without the romantic moments. Just recently, he sent me a letter, not as sweet as this one but it made my heart melt because I wasn’t expecting it. So I guess instead of dwelling on what lacks in our relationship, we can work together to make us a better couple and build a happy family. So yeah, it’s not all always about hearts and flowers, but it is also important to keep the fire burning and don’t lose it as a couple.

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